Top Ten U.S. Presidents

10. William Howard Taft

Weighing over 314 pounds, Taft spent the most of his term scarfing down Ding-Dongs and Sloppy Joes (he liked to call them Sloppy Tafts). Astoundingly huge, this heavy weight accomplished many of his goals during his time as president. However, I'm too lazy to read about what he actually did.

9. Theodore Roosevelt

Known for placing millions of acres under federal protection and dissolving forty four monopolistic corporations, this president is one of the most liked. Among his accomplishments, he also gave a great performance in Night at the Museum.

8. Jimmy Carter

More than just peanuts, the 39th president of the United States achieved many accomplishments. Among his success, he created of the department of energy and the department of education and established a national energy policy.

7. Richard Nixon

Mostly known for resigning after Watergate broke loose, Nixon isn't regarded as a successful president. But come on! Just look at that face!

6. John F. Kennedy

Definitely the most handsome of the bunch, this president laid the groundwork for the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and initiated the Apollo moon mission. Rest in peace Johnny. Rest in peace.

5. George Washington

He was the first.

4. Abraham Lincoln

Licensed bartender, slave liberator, and vampire hunter, Abraham Lincoln was a revolutionary in U.S. leadership. One of the most well known presidents since George Washington, Lincoln is widely regarded as one of the most successful presidents for leading the nation out of a civil war. Aside from his presidency, he had dreams of becoming an actor and spent his days off frequenting the local theaters. However, his love of the theater would unfortunately lead to his demise.

3. Barack Obama

Known for his healthcare reform and retreating U.S. troops back from Iraq, this president's re-election is evidence of his overall approval. Also, if you haven't listened to his latest album, Yeezus, you should check it out.

2. George W. Bush

Famous for his involvement in the Iraq war, George W. Bush has actually accomplished more than Obama has during his two terms. But you know what they say, everything's bigger in Texas.

1. Vladimir Putin

Many skeptics would argue that Vladimir Putin isn't actually a U.S. President. In fact, some might go as far as to say that he isn't even a U.S. citizen. However, if you take the word "Russia" and get rid of "R","s", and "i", you get "usa". Coincidence? I rest my case.